Meet Recovery Rockstar, Stephanie
My name is Stephanie Eddleman, I am 31 I will have a year clean and sober on August 5th. I started smoking pot when I was 15 but my addiction didn't take it's full head on coarse until after the birth of my daughter. I started taking loritabs and perks, had a horrible pregnancy with her I hemerged 6 pints of blood, so after I was released to go home I was in so much pain, I was originally prescribed them but after I ran out, here came my dad to the rescue brought me a whole sandwich bag full of tabs. I loved that feeling of I can be super mom. My son and my daughter are a year and half apart and I worked all the time so much that's the tabs made it to where I could.
I got on a benzo kick briefly, only briefly enough to smack into a tree with my children in the car. My son shattered his jaw in 3 different places. No more xanax after that. After my divorce, I then started experimenting with cocaine. For about 6 months I had to have it. I was working my ass off so I could buy more. I wasted so much money!
I was 25 when I smoked meth for the 1st time, and WOW my dad smoked it with me and our relationship forever changed that day. He became my drug buddy rather than my daddy. I was smoking it hard core for about 7 months, and thought to myself, what the hell am I doing??? Steph.. you have two babies, PULL YOUR SHIT TOGETHER!! I actually stopped on my own, but dammit if I didn't go back to tabs and perks.
For the next 7 years of my life I was spending $900 a week in a pill addiction that was huge. I was introduced to crack on my 29th birthday and I liked the 1st second of that high..but it was a constant chase of that high. I was stealing money from co-workers. When I couldn't steal we were begging for money, selling our belongings, I was bringing my children my sweet babies into Orange Mound Memphis so momma and Patrick could hit a crack pipe or try to get something on the front. I had a moment where it was almost like I had an outer body experience and hated this person I have become. I called my mom told her everything my 10 year pill addiction mixed in with other stuff and my children and I moved home.
I stayed clean for 3 months and relapsed when I ran into a girlfriend and her man sold ice. I was so bored and always had a failure mentality. I lived with my 'mad at the world' mother who hates people but lives Jesus. I had no car because of title loans or accidents. I had nothing to offer my children. I felt like a nobody, so I used... it made me feel normal.
Then I met Dusty Patrick. When I met Dusty, I had been separated for a year (off and on) as I was still using my ex to get what I wanted. It wasn't until I had been with Dusty a few times I learned that he had been in prison a year before and was locked up for manufacturing. This turned me on knowing that he knew how to make it plus he was sexy for being a (STUPID) BAD BOY. He shot meth, I didn't I smoked it or snorted it. Until the way he would explain how it would make me feel. This description finally got to me. I stuck that needle in my arm June of 2015 and did not want it any other way.
A new messed way of life just knocked on my door and I gladly opened it up and let it in. When I didn't have it, I was so dope sick. I couldn't even register my kids for school. I did nothing but lay in the bed and do nothing. I couldn't stop shooting it up. It took only a month and a half for the Lord God to intervene. I needed food for the kids so my ex-husband's sister came by to bring food. I'm sure she looked at me and knew I weighed 100 pounds and my face was swollen with sores. An hour later, cops were knocking on my door and they wanted to check on the kids and my house. It was a mess. They searched the home found all the ingredients to make meth. I told those officers everything they needed to know. I was treated more like a witness rather than a suspect.
I was bonded out the next day and agreed with my family to go get help. I checked myself in to the Hope Center in Tennessee and did 3 months in house then came home and did 6 months of out patient rehab. My ex husband wanted full custody but he was never there before so he wasn't getting going to receive custody. We share joint custody I get them every other weekend. After I surrendered my will over to God, it has been breathtaking. He changes you renews you. I was just offered a job as a live in night manager at a shelter for battered women and I'm in school now. I stay connected and love sharing my picture and testimony for other women and addicts. I have a relationship with Jesus and through everything I don't regret not one single moment. It's because of my mess the Lord has made a message out of it. I am blessed and forever grateful. WE DO RECOVER. Yes it's hard but so is life. But it's so beautiful.